Fall Temptations...

Life on the farm is busy in the fall and full of temptations. This Sunday we are kicking off our fall stand - pumpkins, squash, potatoes, and lots of other yummy stuff including cupcakes! It is always nice to have something "ready to eat" for sale so people can get something for their kids. So tonight I am going to start making them. My first big baking project since I have restarted my weight loss journey. So I will have to try to be "good" and not taste test - too many - cupcakes. Wish me luck!

(the photo is me decorating a cake this spring at a live cake completion I did as an assistant to a friend who decorates cakes)

My trinkets...

I am a pretty visual tactile person. So I wanted someway to help myself visualize what I am doing! I decided a bracelet would be a great way to do that. So I made it yesterday.

One bead for each pound. So far I am down 5 pounds since I joined Weight Watchers again two weeks ago. A small bead for most pounds and a big one for each 5. Once I get to my 10% I may remake it with real silver or I may just add a bigger bead of some kind. I have a long way to go for that!

I hope I have an extra bead or two to add most weeks, and that I do not have to take to many off, because that will be sad...

Dangerously unhealthy!

So according to the Doctor Oz quiz I am dangerously unhealthy!

Well that is not a real surprise. My BMI is 44.1, but that is down one point already from two weeks ago!

The Million Dollar Me site asked me how I felt today. I feel a little frustrated, if you must know, because I wonder even if I loose 2 pounds a week until April (which is pretty unlikely), if I will still be one star and dangerously unhealthy?

I would still be over 200 pounds (203) and a BMI of 34.8. I would have lost over 20% of my body weight, and I would be lighter then I had been since before I could drive. I would feel so much better about myself although I would still be Obese.

My lowest weight in the past 15 years, since my crash diet in college when I got to 220 & destroyed my gallbladder. That would be a huge victory if I could get there with a BMI of 37.8 . Still "Seriously Obese."

If I could be "just Obese" with a BMI of 39.9 that would be a victory at 232, and as low as I had been since I graduated college 14 years ago. To

not be "Morbidly Obese" would be a major

victory. I got within FOUR pounds of this weight

in 2007 when I did weight watchers the first time.

Any of those, I have a feeling will not change how Dr. Oz and the world feels about me being a "fat girl." I am sure I will still be "Dangerously Unhealthy." But maybe it will change how I feel about me being the "fat girl."

Maybe....

The beginning of my Journey!

So I am just now beginning my journey to better health!

At 265 pounds I am frustrated by myself. Annoyed with me and I want to be the me I could be.

I have not been under 220 pounds since I was 20, that is 17 long years. The last time I was under 200 I could not even drive.

After having had huge success with Weight

Watchers in 2007, I recently decided to rejoin and recommit to me. My first weigh in put me at 262.6 pounds. At my height that means my BMI is over 45, and I have over 120 pounds to loose. Even if I could maintain 2 pounds a week that is over a year of loss. That is a long time.

But when I think that if I had started this last September I might be homing in on my goal? That gives me huge hope! (This photo is of me just a couple weeks ago, at old Fort Niagara, this is about as much of a close up as you will see of me.)

Is it just coincidence that two weeks after I rejoined Weight Watchers Doctor Oz started Transformation Nation? I DON'T THINK SO! I am going to work on a Million Dollar me! I want to feel like a million dollars & I am ready to do the work.

But right now, I am not worrying about the final goal. I am setting many mini-goals. My first BIG goal is to be under a 40 BMI by Christmas, that also, happens to be close with 10% of my body weight.